The Writing Mamas Daily BlogEach day on the Writing Mamas Daily Blog, a different member will write about mothering.
If you're a mom then you've said these words, you've made these observations and you've lived these situations - 24/7.
And for that, you are a goddess.
Monday, June 23, 2008
What the Hell is Going On?
Is it just me or is everybody going through something right now?
I was at a "princess" birthday party today for my daughter's friend when I saw her aunt and was stunned by her appearance. She looked gaunt and weighed down, as well as down. She was having health and job issues.
Then I saw a friend who I know is having marital problems. I asked how she was doing and listened as she told me she is likely to get divorced, but is worried how this may affect her children.
I found out yesterday that my neighbor had just completed radiation treatment for prostrate cancer. He seemed OK whenever I talked to him but when I saw him walking his dogs I noticed his gait was slow. Now I know why.
My sister called me complaining about her boyfriend. They have been together for two years and still no commitment. He told her there was no one else in the world he would rather be with but he didn't want to live together and if they did ever marry, she would have to sign a prenup. Are these red flags, she wondered?
Another friend called to complain about how difficult a time she is having raising her children, and the judgements of others about what they perceive as her lack of discipline. What they don't see is how often she is strict and tries to set boundaries.
My sister-in-law is grieving the loss of her husband. Meanwhile, people are telling her she should be over it already. What has it been, a month? When she tried to go back to work she had to leave because co-workers kept coming into her office and asking what happened, instead of saying I'm so sorry to hear what happened.
I could go on and on about friends and family but there is something in the air -- not just heat and humidity -- that seems to be signaling a change.
So often it seems we have to go through a tunnel of darkness to get to the other side. I wish that the pain and suffering were not so but they do present lessons; life is not always in our control.
We are lucky because having children is a place of center. They force us to move through our illnesses, our losses, our insecurities -- they force us to move. Forward.
It is the simple things. The laundry that has to be washed and folded. The meals that need to be made. The time spent with our kids because they need us. And we need them.
EVERYBODY is going through something. All things take time. But -- everything does get better.
Just as we cultivate our gardens, we must nurture ourselves. Even if it is five minutes of breathing in a view of a beautiful mountain or noticing the intense color of a flower, we must take time for ourselves.
Of course, as parents, time is the one thing we lack. That's why taking even a few moments for ourselves is incredibly important.
By Dawn Yun
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Great contemplative piece Dawn. Life is overwhelming. Just reading the morning news, gloomier by the day lately requires extra deep breaths to ward off anxiety and stress. But "It is the simple things" in which we can find meaning. The little moments to give thanks and count our blessings, which are always there.Post a Comment