The Writing Mamas Daily Blog

Each day on the Writing Mamas Daily Blog, a different member will write about mothering.

If you're a mom then you've said these words, you've made these observations and you've lived these situations - 24/7.

And for that, you are a goddess.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007


The Jar

I don’t remember what I ate, possibly undercooked chives or garlic, but it was a rough night. I felt obliged to apologize for my flatulence. But I needn’t; my daughter took the matter into her own hands. She pulled out a mason jar and declared, “every time you fart, Mommy, you have to put a quarter in the jar.”

I should be more sensitive, but I am not. I responded, “Okay, as long as every time you ask to go shopping, you put a quarter in the jar.” I tittered at my own joke. My daughter did not. She was quiet, might I say stunned. So how often does she ask to go shopping, you may ask. Folks, it is every friggin’ day.

‘So, can we go to Target to get a knapsack?

“But you already have one.”

“I know, but I have 20 bucks to spend.”

“You could save that up for something else.”

“I don’t want anything else.”

“In a few days you will think of something you want.

“But I want a knapsack; the one I have is too heavy.

“It’s fine, really, it works fine, during the summer, it won’t be so heavy.”

“So, can we go today?”

“NO, WE’RE NOT GOING SHOPPING TODAY. IT’S NOT A HIGH PRIORITY, and I am not going to give it a lot of thought.”

I wish I could say this exchange was an exception that proves the rule, but it is not. This is how raw we are with one another. How then to tone it down and get on a more genteel track?

The jar. I put it away after our fart/shopping exchange. Then I pulled it out again. As I drove around somewhere, I recalled that a few years ago when I was married, I suggested that we put a quarter in a jar every time one of us was sarcastic. Shoulda’ insisted on it. Might still be married.

The jar. It might have some value now. It could be quiet thing. Perhaps any time any of us says something we should not have said, we could put a quarter in the jar. Talking about the infraction would be optional. Give the money to a charity of my daughter’s choice when it’s full.


By Vicki Inglis

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